Should You Be Asking Your Partner If They Would Be Your Valentine?

The tradition of asking your partner to be your Valentine has people in a chokehold nowadays. Some people hope to  be asked out by their partner, while others believe that once you’re in a relationship, there’s no need for a formal invitation, as you automatically become each other’s Valentine. 

Ariana Chayka, a current senior, has strong perceptions on this topic. Chayka believes that you should in fact, be asking your partner out to be your Valentine.

“Yes, you should be asking your partner to be your valentine and not just assume that they already are,” Chayka said.
Chayka’s reasoning for this is because she knows that some people have different perspectives on the holidays. 

“Some people think that whilst you’re in a relationship, every day should feel like Valentine’s Day. They believe that showing love and affection to your partner should happen every day, not just on holidays. Others choose not to celebrate Valentine’s Day because of personal reasons or religious beliefs. This is why you should make it known that you will be celebrating Valentine’s Day with your partner to avoid any confusion.” 

Many people have strong feelings about the holiday, and would be angered or hurt if their partner chose to not ask them to be their valentine. Whilst others would not be upset, such as Chayka who explains why she would feel this way.

“ I would not be upset, I would just know what their intentions are. What I mean by this, is that I would understand that they don’t want me to be their valentine, and that is okay,” Chayka said.

To try to understand more about the tradition of asking your Valentine out, we discussed how Valentine’s day tradition has changed. Through this exploration, we gained insights into the evolving nature of expressing affection and companionship on Valentine’s Day.

“ I believe throughout history it has relatively stayed the same, as there are some men who will put more effort into special holidays to make their partner feel loved while others don’t feel the need to,” Christian Martinez said. 

Taking a different approach, Christian Martinez explains his perspective on this topic.

“I believe that while you’re in a relationship with someone, they are automatically your Valentine. But you should still go out your way to do something for them, to make them feel special. I would understand why someone would be upset if they were not asked, but me personally, I would not care too much about it,” Martinez said.

Martinez feels as though there is not a need to ask but he understands as to why the holiday is important. 

“Back then people would do much more romantic things and go out of their way to celebrate the holiday. Nowadays, the holiday is much more casual and laid back,” Martinez said.

As seen throughout the interviews taken place, the perception of Valentine’s Day varies throughout the dynamic of a relationship. Ultimately, what matters most is the mutual understanding between partners. If you know that your partner wants to be asked out, then an effort should be made. A simple handmade card with their favorite snacks can be used to ask your partner to be your valentine. Communication and understanding each other’s expectations can help ensure both partners feel valued and appreciated on Valentine’s Day. 

Ebelyn Suquilema Lema

Hey, my name is Ebelyn and I’m a senior at Thomas Edison High School. My shop is graphic design, and I love watching scary movies and making bracelets!